Because I have a mild obsession with sharks and have for the past like, five years. I have a shark shower curtain, a shark soap dispenser, a shark poster on my door, a shark bottle opener, a shark screensaver...the list goes on. I like sharks.
and B) I found this absurd video on youtube:
And here we have some shark cookies.
Ingredients:
2 cups flour
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup Earth Balance
1 1/2 tsp Ener-G + 2 tbsp warm water
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp vanilla
1. Mix Earth Balance and sugar.
2. Add in egg replacer.
3. Add in flour.
4. Look at your dog eat a football. Like, legitimately eat one side of it.
5. Add in baking powder and salt.
6. Add in vanilla (while looking at your ridiculous dog hiding under the table).
7. Lightly flour your rolling surface.
8. Roll out your dough. And simultaneously, don't judge me for using a wine bottle. I am cheap and these came free with my wine.
9. Yes, this just happened:
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW YEAH BITCHES WE'RE GONNA HAVE SHARK COOKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTT.
And if you want to make vegan icing btw, you can mix coconut milk and powdered sugar and maybe some food coloring until you get the desired consistency.
Also, use sprinkles. Because obviously you need to.
Disclaimer: I DO know that not all sugar is vegan but I don't give a shit because I think that's kind of crossing the line of vegan insanity.
SO HERE WE HAVE THE MASTERPIECES
(Oh and also I wanted to make rainbow shooting stars FUCK YEAH)
*Sigh.* This is my life. I don't know whether to be extremely proud of it or embarrassed, so the only logical thing I can think to do is post it all over the internet so everyone gets fucking
JEALOUS.
This is Sheldon the Shark. Look at him! HE'S GREAT
RATINGS:
Deliciousness: 2.5/5
Not insanely tasty, not bad. Tastes like a hard sugar cookie with frosting on it. It's edible and mildly tasty.
Prettiness: 28thousand//5
LOOK AT THAT SHIT IT'S A SHARK COOKIE WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.
Ease of Preparation: 3/5
Kind of a mess. Hey, it's sugar cookies! You roll those things OUT ON A FLOURED SURFACE. Shit's gonna get messaaayyyy.
Just stumbled onto your blog. You are hilarious! I'm about three months into veganhood and scouring the internets for recipes and such. I've yet to find them quite as fun as yours. I dig it!
ReplyDeleteCool! I'm glad you like my insanity!!! This blog is just basically going through all my vegan cookbooks / online posted recipes and trying them out, then rating them. Since I know there are about a billion recipe books out there, I thought it would be nice to see someone else trying them out to prove if they're worth your time. :) If you have any questions about vegan-ness, feel free to message me or add me on facebook!
Delete3 Studies PROVE Why Coconut Oil Kills Fat.
ReplyDeleteThe meaning of this is that you literally burn fat by eating Coconut Fat (including coconut milk, coconut cream and coconut oil).
These 3 researches from big medicinal magazines are sure to turn the conventional nutrition world around!