Meatballs???.....No, WHEATBALLS!

I've been MIA on the blog for awhile....I've had a weird past couple of weeks, so forgive me!

Anywho, I am going to make a WHEATBALL SUB in a few days. To make this delightfulness, I need to make (ahead of time)

A) Wheatballs
B) Marinara Sauce
C) "Cheese Sauce"

FIRST, LET'S MAKE WHEATBALLS!

This recipe comes from Vegan On The Cheap. :)

So to make wheatballs, you will need chickpeas, raw mushrooms, tomato paste, soy sauce, olive oil, wheat gluten flour, bread crumbs, fresh parsley, nutritional yeast, salt, pepper, paprika, dried basil, and dried oregano. Yeah, it's a lot of stuff. Get over it.

You're supposed to put the chickpeas, chopped mushrooms, parsley, and minced garlic into a food processor and chop it up till it's coursely ground. I am not fancy enough to have a food processor, so I mashed the chickpeas with my hands and I chopped the mushrooms up really fine, and I chopped the parsley up really fine, and I mixed the garlic into this delightful batter.

After that, you basically mix in all the rest of the shit until all the ingredients are well-dispersed and the smell delights you.

Then you're going to knead the dough! Heehee! The cool thing about this is that you eventually find that kneading the dough will bring out the elasticity of the wheat gluten. The batter will become more rubbery and connected.

Then you're gonna make WHEATBALLS.

If you want, you can just put all the wheatball dough into one giant wheatball.

With this, you could probably play a game of bowling. Unfortunately, the olive oil in the wheatball will make your bowling ball slicker than the other kids' bowling balls, they will all get jealous, and claim you're cheating.

So instead, you can make one tiny wheatball...

And turn it into a clown nose.

Or, you can just use a bunch of tiny wheatballs as legitimate wheatballs, then put them on a lightly oiled baking sheet, and bake them at 375 for about 20 minutes.

You know, do what you want.

RATINGS:

Deliciousness: 5/5 
They taste hearty and have an AWESOME texture. The very Italian-y spices make them taste very homey, comfort-food-ish. 


Ease of Preparation: 2/5
If you have a food processor, I'm sure this is super easy. But I had to chop everything up myself. :(

Prettiness: 5/5 
They're definitely way cuter than meatballs. The combination of ingredients gives it a rich variety of colors and textures. Super fancy looking. 

Product Review: Kimchi

There's an Asian grocery store down the street from my apartment. It's called Uwajimaya.

The awesome thing about Uwajimaya is that it's probably the biggest Asian grocery store I've seen in the United States (and I think it holds some record as being the biggest on the West Coast or something).

For us vegans, this place is PARADISE. So many Asian countries just so happen to be vegan-friendly, and therefore a lot of vegan products lie hidden on Uwajimaya's shelves!

If there's one Korean food I love most, it's definitely kimchi. What is kimchi?

There are many different varieties of kimchi, but generally it is a fermented napa cabbage dish with all kinds of delightful spices. It's usually bright red because it is most often made with chili peppers. It's delightful!

It also smells kind of strong, which freaks many people out. (After all, how can something fermented NOT smell strong?)

So Uwajimaya has a WHOLE refrigerated section devoted to kimchi....

I died.

I also almost bought one of the massive buckets of kimchi at the bottom (for $19.99 I could eat kimchi every day for WEEKS!)

Alas, I resisted. I bought a wee little bowl of it and was please with my serving.

Kimchi is generally served alone and since it's super salty, I usually eat it as a nice little treat. However, it's definitely NOT bad for you. "Health" magazine even rated it as one of the top five "World's Healthiest Foods". It's low in calories, high in fiber and high in various vitamins from the veggies.

Try it!

RATING: 5/5

Product Review: So Delicious Coconut Milk

So I've decided to add another dimension to my blog: product reviews!

Do you ever go into a grocery store, see something weird-as-hell or super delicious looking or something that seems to fit that gap in your nutrition perfectly?

I do this shit all the time.

So I'm gonna start reviewing things so you guys won't end up buying stuff that seems perfect and later finding out it's gross (like I always do), or so you guys might be veganspired to try something new. ;-]

So we're gonna start with this:

So Delicious Coconut Milk

I don't know about you, but milk is one of those staple products I always have in my fridge. I drink it with granola, on its own, in a latte, use it for sauces, use it for baking, etc. So I used to just use soy, but then realized that over-soy-ing my life isn't a good idea.

So I've been branching out. I didn't like hemp milk, almond milk was ok, rice milk was too watery, and hazelnut milk tasted like pee.

Then I found this coconut milk stuff on sale at Whole Foods. I decided to try it.

I once had this TERRIBLE experience with Malibu rum (back when I didn't know how to drink responsibly) and ever since then, the smell of coconut has made me want to throw up. Needless to say, I was very concerned about buying this coconut milk.

But alas, there's a picture of Jillian Michaels on it, which means that if I drink this stuff I will be immediately badass.

Also, there are only 80 calories in a cup of it. It's also full of fat, but it's full of GOOD fats. Delightful. :-]

So I tried it. I LOVED IT. It's SUPERRRRRRRRR creamy, it only has a very very light coconut aftertaste (and it's not the fake coconut taste, which apparently is what makes me want to barf), it tastes light, and it's a perfect WHITE COLOR! A vegan milk that's white, not an off-white or yellow or brown?! AWESOME!

But seriously, the creaminess is what sold me. It's literally the creamiest milk I've ever had.

So I've gotten in the habit of making coconut lattes with agave nectar.

It's pretty much my favorite. :-]

RATING: 5/5

Say CHEEZE!

I would like to preface this post by pointing out that I'm one of those lucky bitches who never really was obsessed with cheese.

That's right.

WHEN GOING VEGAN, I DID NOT MISS CHEESE.

SUCKAHS!

So when I decided to make a 'cheezey sauce' it wasn't because I miss cheese. No, it was actually because

THERE ARE SO DAMN MANY OF THEM IN MY COOKBOOKS THAT I FIGURED I SHOULD KNOW WHY THE FUCK PEOPLE LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

So I picked a random one out of Vegan A Go-Go!.

Wolffie's Nutritional-Yeast "Cheese" Sauce Pg 126

I don't know who the hell Wolffie is, but here we go.

This recipe seems to be going for a basic, queso-like sauce. There are no fancy herbs or chunks of anything in it, just flour, nutritional yeast, salt, oil, mustard, tamari, and water.

You whisk all these things together and put it in a small saucepan.

While it's heating up, you'll notice it get thicker.

When it's thickened to your liking, remove it from the heat and serve.

I always hear that people dip veggies in cheese sauces, so I decided to dip some celery in this sauce. I don't know if that's normal, but that's what I did. Hahahah. I'm used to eating my veggies on their lonesome.

RATINGS:

Ease of preparaton: 5/5 
You seriously whisk some crap together and heat it for about 5 minutes. Delightfully simple.

Deliciousness: 3/5 
Ok, so I struggled with this rating. On the one hand, I liked the stuff. It tastes like a decent dip, especially since I served it warm with some chilled celery. However, I don't know if I would describe it as 'cheesy'. It had that cheese-like quality...I don't know what you'd call it...that sort of musty quality? But it certainly didn't have the smoothness that cheese has. You know how cheese sauces are smooth and creamy? Well this stuff didn't taste milky or smooth, it tasted...nutty and cheese-like. So overall, it was delicious as a dip, but if I'm comparing it to cheese I would probably be left disappointed.

Prettiness: 2/5 
Kind of looks grainy and dull. But I would LOVE to spice this stuff up with some chives or chopped fresh oregano or dried chili peppers. Very basic, but easy to fancy up. :-]

Vegetable Fiesta Time

So, it's been awhile since I posted. But I'm BACK!

So one day, I went to Ikea with my friend Wanda and bought a giant pot. It was like, 10 bucks. Ikea rocks my world.

After I bought my giant pot, I decided to make soup.

SO HERE'S THE SOUP I'VE MADE! It's from Vegan On The Cheap!

Summer Garden Soup Pg 69

This delightful soup appealed to me because it literally is chock full of veggies. I often crave veggies, especially really hearty ones like carrots and sweet potatoes and squash, so this recipe looked SIMPLY DELIGHTFUL.

So in your pile of veggies, you'll have:

Onion
Garlic
Potatoes
Carrots
Green Beans
Squash
Tomatoes
Zucchini

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS SO MANY VEGETABLES TO APPEASE MY VEGGIE-LUST.

So you're going to chop up the onion, carrot, potatoes, garlic, and green beans first. Mince the garlic, cut the beans into 1-inch pieces. Chop the rest however the hell you want. <3

On a side note, this onion made me sob. I rarely ever sob because of onion chopping, but this one was a real tear-jerker.

I use a few tricks to prevent myself from onion-cries. First of all, I ALWAYS chill my onions. Second of all, I usually open all my windows and chop by a window so the onion fumes go outside and don't get trapped in my little apartment (this is where I failed this time). Finally, I always chop super fast so my onion doesn't get warm and start secreting those stinging chemicals before I'm done chopping it!

There are other tricks, however, to prevent onion-cries:

- Wear goggles
- Burn a candle nearby
- Chop it under running water
- Hold a slice of bread in your mouth while you chop

So after you've finished crying over your onion, you will  heat up some olive oil in a giant pot.

Add your chopped veggies!

While your first batch of veggies is simmering, you will chop up the rest of your veggies.

I think I was supposed to buy a summer squash, but a bought a winter delicata squash instead. Woops! :-]

Anyways, you will have chopped zucchini, chopped squash, and chopped tomatoes to throw into your pot.

Now that you've got that going on, you will throw in your soup stock. I use this better-than-bouillon stuff they sell at Madison Market (it's vegan and tastes JUST like chicken stock!) but you can use whatever you like.

You can even go super-hippie and use your own vegetable stock you've made by chopping up a billion vegetables. Look at you, you little hippie-vegan-freak!

I'm really just jealous, though, because I want to be a super cool hippe-vegan-freak.

Once your soup has been simmering for about 20 minutes, you will add some fresh parsley and fresh basil to the mix. The smells will delight you. :-]

Give your soup a few more minutes to cook, and it's ready to go!

SOUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

(PS: The recipe called for white beans to be put into the soup too, but I thought the soup was already chunky enough with the veggies that the beans would just weigh it down. I may have put some barley into it if I had some on hand, though...:-]

RATINGS:

Ease of preparation: 4/5
Lots of chopping! But really, since it all goes into one batch of food and it's hard to mess up simply cooking stuff in a big pot, it's overall not that difficult.

Deliciousness: 4/5 
Really satisfying, hearty soup. However, I would probably not have cooked the potatoes in with the first batch of vegetables becasue they got overcooked and mushy. I also would probably add some more fresh herbs to the mix.  A little fresh oregano never hurt anyone!

Prettiness: 2/5 
For being such a veggie-filled soup, this ends up looking pretty mushy and kinda unappetizing. The veggies, being cooked pretty well, don't look as vibrant as they did when they were fresh.